Which Trait to Cultivate IV - fishing for clear IDEAS

I shared my ideas on teaching sentence fluency in a previous blog post, using the analogy of the early morning atmosphere on the lake when the water would be smooth as glass, which is how varied sentencing in sentence fluency could cause your writing to flow smoothly. Imagine water skiing on a lake of "glass" and how that would feel. This is the way I want my students' writings to feel to the reader.

I would like to extend that analogy into teaching students to share clear IDEAS, another of the 6+1 Traits of Good Writing.

When your sentence fluency reads smoothly, like the smooth water when you're out on a boat or ready to water ski at dawn, when the wind is non-existent and the crowds are not yet on the lake, your ideas are clear and understandable.

Why does the fisherman like to fish so early in the morning? Obviously the fish are biting because it's breakfast time, but isn't it also because it's a great time for clarity. For calm thought? For serenity?

And beyond the smoothness of the water at dawn, the water is also CLEAR. Sometimes you can even see the fish swimming underneath you. Or when the creek is running smoothly downstream, the crystal clear water shows you where the fish are swimming. Clear ideas give you strong visuals of plot or ideas in writing.

But how do you teach students to write clearly?

Well, the Step Up to Writing curriculum helps with that. In essay (or paragraph) writing, we teach students to share their main ideas and then support their thoughts with ELABORATION. And there are some great ways to put elaboration in your writing. Try one of these things (they're all E's...handy, right?):

• EXAMPLES: provide examples to back up your ideas
• ELABORATION: tell the reader a bit more
• EVIDENCE: share evidence to support a point
• EXPERT OPINION: cite an expert for support
• EFFECTIVE ILLUSTRATION: provide detail to paint a picture in the reader's mind
• EXPERIENCES: tell about your experiences or the experiences of another
• EVERYDAY LIFE: explain how your idea impacts everyday life
• EXACT INFORMATION: explicit, precise details
• EXPLANATIONS: help the reader understand more clearly

So whenever a student wants to share a main idea or thought, have them state their idea and then back it up with one of the options above. For example, a student may begin a paragraph by saying, "Fishing with my uncle is a very peaceful activity." This is the main idea, the topic sentence.

The next line could be an Elaborative EXAMPLE provided to back up the idea:

"I remember a day the two of us arrived so early at the lake that we were the first ones out there. We talked in low voices, and it was so relaxing to hang out with my favorite fisherman."

Using an Elaborative piece of EVERYDAY LIFE, it might sound like this:

"After the hustle and bustle of school, practices, and chores, my uncle takes me out to the lake every so often to get away from it all."

Depending on the main idea, many different pieces of Elaboration could occur and affect the direction of the paragraph.

How might it sound when writing a personal or imaginative narrative?

With more creative writing experiences, students must elaborate differently. While examples and snippets of everyday life may work in a narrative piece, the development of characters and descriptions of the scenes make ideas clearer.

I could tell you that my main character, Oscar, is a "tall, broad, linebacker-like man," which gives a visual picture, and this is important, but I want to know more about the character. Revealing actions and attitudes that back up (read: elaborate on) that idea would be effective as well. I might go on to tell you about how: 

Oscar was stopped by two rough-looking men at the door. He thought of turning around and returning at a later time, but he instead approached the nearest man with open arms and a large smile. The man, disarmed by Oscar's approach, looked up at Oscar with furrowed brow but accepted the embrace. While in the bear hug, Oscar said, "It's been a long time. Too long!" The man, suffocated by Oscar's bulk, stood helpless, eyes bulging, as Oscar slowly spun him around, then released him as he entered through the door, backing away from the two men, eyes locked on his "old friend." He winked, turned, and walked inside.

Oscar's suspenseful embrace proves his strength with a well-developed and descriptive scene. Instead of (or in addition to) saying that Oscar was a "tall, broad, linebacker-like man," the action of the scene has described it better. This is the elaboration within story, within narrative. The same thing can occur with a character's attitude or thought. It can occur with the description of the scene or during an event that occurs. Students can learn to elaborate through description of character or event. With practice, students will learn to enjoy playing with their language to make it clearer and more interesting.

Seeing the main idea through the elaboration is like seeing the fish through the clear water.

This is the teaching of IDEAS within the 6+1 Traits of Good Writing.

And this is what I aim to help students learn. I commit to this type of teaching for all my students, and, as I usually offer, I can help a student you know who may need this type of instruction. Just go to my instructional website and see if it might be JustWrite for the student you have in mind!